What a week…what a week. Before I get into all that happened this week, I want you to harken back to the days of the person we elected President before George W. Bush. Actually, it was the President we elected before we elected Al Gore, William Jefferson Clinton.
The stock market was up, unemployment was down and we were prospering. President Clinton received a great deal of credit for all of that and his poll numbers were pretty darn good as a result. Many people contended that Clinton’s popularity was a direct result of how the economy was doing. Hence the phrase, “It’s the economy stupid”, was born. Remember that phrase for later.
“The week that was” started on Monday during the committee of the whole meeting. Councilmen Boyd and Jeffers were missing. The City administration paraded various “experts” in front of the City Council claiming that it was a good thing for the City to have central water and sewer, but none of them said fully functioning septic systems were bad for the environment. They did not address the most important issue, however. Stay tuned for that.
Next came the regular City Council meeting, during which the City Council discussed whether or not to re-start construction on the SW4 utilities expansion project. Councilmen Boyd and Jeffers were still missing. Quite frankly, I don’t blame them. I wouldn’t want to show up and have to answer hard questions either. Nevertheless, Councilman Day suggested a delay on the vote to re-start construction for one week. However, the scare tactic was already firmly implanted in the brains of the feeble minded Council members who decided to vote against that proposal. Therefore, that vote failed 3 to 3.
Nonetheless, there was still hope of forestalling the re-start because, Allah be praised, Lippy LePera voted with Day and Rosado for the week’s delay. Therefore, one could safely conclude if Lippy wanted to wait a week to vote on a re-start, she would vote against the re-start when it came up for a vote later on. NOT SO FAST MY FRIEND!!! First of all, when it came time to vote on the re-start, Lippy thought that vote was already taken. Oh confusion, my name is LePera! Lippy then cast her vote to re-start the project, thereby joining Phony Feichthaler, Befooled Bertolini and Tricky Dick Stevens in effectively (insert graphic and vulgar word for sexual intercourse here) the citizens.
I heard Phony Feichthaler say on at least a couple of occasions that Terry “Tight Lips” Stewart was the “glue that held the Charter School Board together”. Glue gives off fumes that give people a certain buzz, and could result in their doing strange things. Lippy sits next to Tight Lips. Is it possible that she inadvertently inhaled the fumes from the glue and that is what caused her to become confused, reverse her stance and vote against the people? I believe there are masks available that would protect her from the fumes, if that is indeed her problem. Perhaps she should ask the Council to approve the cost. After all, if Bertolini can get a new chair, why can’t LePera get a gas mask?
Ah, but I digress. Next up came the promised town hall meeting on Wednesday that “would give the citizens the opportunity to be heard”. Now let me get this straight. The citizens were given a screw job on Monday with the vote to re-start the project. They were then given the “opportunity” to be heard on Wednesday? Beam me up Scotty. There isn’t any intelligent life left on Earth.
Actually, the town hall meeting on Wednesday was more like “The Terry Stewart Show”. Wait, I have a better name for it. Have you ever seen the commercials for the DVD’s “Girls Gone Wild”? With that in mind, a better name for the show last Wednesday night would be “Egomaniac Gone Wild” because, no matter who was asked the question, Stewart chimed in and gave his 1 ½ cents worth. He was so uptight that I may have to change his nickname from “Tight Lips” to “Tight Shorts” because something was definitely too tight.
On top of all that, Stewart sent out a letter attempting to defend himself. No big deal. When somebody screws up, it’s understandable that he would attempt to justify his actions, e.g., George W. Bush. Nevertheless, that justification cost the taxpayers TWENTY THOUSAND DOLLARS! That’s a dollar sign followed by the numbers two and zero, followed by a comma and then followed by three more zeroes, i.e., $20,000.
To end the week, Stewart rounded up some more cheerleaders Friday to speak before the Council For Progress, aka, “Let’s Meet Once a Month for Breakfast, Talk About a Lot of Stuff, and Never Accomplish Anything Club”. According to “The Light Wind” newspaper, Stewart said at that meeting that if the utility expansion program stopped, economic development would go away. Another person reportedly said that new businesses would not move into Cape Coral without proper water and sewer systems. That hasn’t stopped them yet. If money is to be made, businesses will move in...period.
More importantly than that however is the fact that Stewart is out speaking about POLICY DECISIONS that should be made by the City Council. You remember the City Council, don’t you? Those are the people who were elected to make policy decisions. Oops. I forgot. Stewart makes all the decisions and his puppets on the City Council just dance on his strings.
To sum up the week, the City Council ignored the taxpayers and re-started the sewer expansion project; Stewart and his boys supported his administration and MWH, trashed the Kessler report, defended the utilities expansion project and then used fear tactics to make his point. Is that about it?
Now go back to the first paragraph I wrote. Change the phrase from “It’s the economy stupid” to “IT’S THE COST STUPID”!!! Why didn’t all those who defended the project, trashed Kessler, etc., talk about how much it was costing the citizens and how much MWH/KBR is making from these projects? Most people would not be opposed to central water and sewer if it weren’t for the cost. Check the numbers!!! If you can’t do it alone, get some third graders to help you. Even they would be able to figure out what some Council members don’t get. THE PEOPLE ARE BEING OVERCHARGED!!!
Holy cha-ching Batman! What’s it going to take before those idiots on City Council realize that…revelations that KBR has been fined for overcharging the government on some projects? Oh wait. That’s already happened. OHMYGOD!!! Some City Council members can’t read!!! Now what do we do?
What can possibly happen this week to top last week? Will the missing Council members return? Will the citizens recall the City Council members and take over the City? Will the mysterious thumping sound return to the SW part of the City?
Stay tuned for the answers to those and other questions in the next episode of “As The Toilet Flushes”.
PAGE TWO
Read page one again. It’s good.
And now, emails from readers.
Dear Paco,
I heard Councilman Dick Stevens say he was an ordained minister. What do you think about that?
A.R.
Dear A.R.,
Actions speak louder than words.
Dear Paco,
Who would replace those Council members the citizens voted to recall?
D.B., A.B., E.F., J.J., A.L., R.S.
Dear D.B., A.B., E.F., J.J., A.L., R.S.,
Who cares?
Recalled or not, you heard it through the Capevine.
The stock market was up, unemployment was down and we were prospering. President Clinton received a great deal of credit for all of that and his poll numbers were pretty darn good as a result. Many people contended that Clinton’s popularity was a direct result of how the economy was doing. Hence the phrase, “It’s the economy stupid”, was born. Remember that phrase for later.
“The week that was” started on Monday during the committee of the whole meeting. Councilmen Boyd and Jeffers were missing. The City administration paraded various “experts” in front of the City Council claiming that it was a good thing for the City to have central water and sewer, but none of them said fully functioning septic systems were bad for the environment. They did not address the most important issue, however. Stay tuned for that.
Next came the regular City Council meeting, during which the City Council discussed whether or not to re-start construction on the SW4 utilities expansion project. Councilmen Boyd and Jeffers were still missing. Quite frankly, I don’t blame them. I wouldn’t want to show up and have to answer hard questions either. Nevertheless, Councilman Day suggested a delay on the vote to re-start construction for one week. However, the scare tactic was already firmly implanted in the brains of the feeble minded Council members who decided to vote against that proposal. Therefore, that vote failed 3 to 3.
Nonetheless, there was still hope of forestalling the re-start because, Allah be praised, Lippy LePera voted with Day and Rosado for the week’s delay. Therefore, one could safely conclude if Lippy wanted to wait a week to vote on a re-start, she would vote against the re-start when it came up for a vote later on. NOT SO FAST MY FRIEND!!! First of all, when it came time to vote on the re-start, Lippy thought that vote was already taken. Oh confusion, my name is LePera! Lippy then cast her vote to re-start the project, thereby joining Phony Feichthaler, Befooled Bertolini and Tricky Dick Stevens in effectively (insert graphic and vulgar word for sexual intercourse here) the citizens.
I heard Phony Feichthaler say on at least a couple of occasions that Terry “Tight Lips” Stewart was the “glue that held the Charter School Board together”. Glue gives off fumes that give people a certain buzz, and could result in their doing strange things. Lippy sits next to Tight Lips. Is it possible that she inadvertently inhaled the fumes from the glue and that is what caused her to become confused, reverse her stance and vote against the people? I believe there are masks available that would protect her from the fumes, if that is indeed her problem. Perhaps she should ask the Council to approve the cost. After all, if Bertolini can get a new chair, why can’t LePera get a gas mask?
Ah, but I digress. Next up came the promised town hall meeting on Wednesday that “would give the citizens the opportunity to be heard”. Now let me get this straight. The citizens were given a screw job on Monday with the vote to re-start the project. They were then given the “opportunity” to be heard on Wednesday? Beam me up Scotty. There isn’t any intelligent life left on Earth.
Actually, the town hall meeting on Wednesday was more like “The Terry Stewart Show”. Wait, I have a better name for it. Have you ever seen the commercials for the DVD’s “Girls Gone Wild”? With that in mind, a better name for the show last Wednesday night would be “Egomaniac Gone Wild” because, no matter who was asked the question, Stewart chimed in and gave his 1 ½ cents worth. He was so uptight that I may have to change his nickname from “Tight Lips” to “Tight Shorts” because something was definitely too tight.
On top of all that, Stewart sent out a letter attempting to defend himself. No big deal. When somebody screws up, it’s understandable that he would attempt to justify his actions, e.g., George W. Bush. Nevertheless, that justification cost the taxpayers TWENTY THOUSAND DOLLARS! That’s a dollar sign followed by the numbers two and zero, followed by a comma and then followed by three more zeroes, i.e., $20,000.
To end the week, Stewart rounded up some more cheerleaders Friday to speak before the Council For Progress, aka, “Let’s Meet Once a Month for Breakfast, Talk About a Lot of Stuff, and Never Accomplish Anything Club”. According to “The Light Wind” newspaper, Stewart said at that meeting that if the utility expansion program stopped, economic development would go away. Another person reportedly said that new businesses would not move into Cape Coral without proper water and sewer systems. That hasn’t stopped them yet. If money is to be made, businesses will move in...period.
More importantly than that however is the fact that Stewart is out speaking about POLICY DECISIONS that should be made by the City Council. You remember the City Council, don’t you? Those are the people who were elected to make policy decisions. Oops. I forgot. Stewart makes all the decisions and his puppets on the City Council just dance on his strings.
To sum up the week, the City Council ignored the taxpayers and re-started the sewer expansion project; Stewart and his boys supported his administration and MWH, trashed the Kessler report, defended the utilities expansion project and then used fear tactics to make his point. Is that about it?
Now go back to the first paragraph I wrote. Change the phrase from “It’s the economy stupid” to “IT’S THE COST STUPID”!!! Why didn’t all those who defended the project, trashed Kessler, etc., talk about how much it was costing the citizens and how much MWH/KBR is making from these projects? Most people would not be opposed to central water and sewer if it weren’t for the cost. Check the numbers!!! If you can’t do it alone, get some third graders to help you. Even they would be able to figure out what some Council members don’t get. THE PEOPLE ARE BEING OVERCHARGED!!!
Holy cha-ching Batman! What’s it going to take before those idiots on City Council realize that…revelations that KBR has been fined for overcharging the government on some projects? Oh wait. That’s already happened. OHMYGOD!!! Some City Council members can’t read!!! Now what do we do?
What can possibly happen this week to top last week? Will the missing Council members return? Will the citizens recall the City Council members and take over the City? Will the mysterious thumping sound return to the SW part of the City?
Stay tuned for the answers to those and other questions in the next episode of “As The Toilet Flushes”.
PAGE TWO
Read page one again. It’s good.
And now, emails from readers.
Dear Paco,
I heard Councilman Dick Stevens say he was an ordained minister. What do you think about that?
A.R.
Dear A.R.,
Actions speak louder than words.
Dear Paco,
Who would replace those Council members the citizens voted to recall?
D.B., A.B., E.F., J.J., A.L., R.S.
Dear D.B., A.B., E.F., J.J., A.L., R.S.,
Who cares?
Recalled or not, you heard it through the Capevine.
